He Didn’t Have To Be – But I’m Glad He Was

Brad Paisley co-wrote a song about my dad. Although I’m sure if you asked him, he’d say he get’s that a lot but it isn’t about my dad (nor the next person in line with the same claim). He’s glad I like the song, though. I like my version better – it IS about my dad.

You probably already guessed the song I write of is “He Didn’t Have To Be.” It’s a wonderful ballad about a man, a step-dad, who is such a good father that the young man hopes to be half as good as. Here’s a YouTube link if you want to take a listen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iin2EgTsC9o

It’s not uncommon for families to be stepped, anymore. I’ve pondered how difficult it must be to fall in love with that perfect someone and assume new or added parental responsibilities from the very beginning. Talk about baggage! We all know of or have seen situations that are less than ideal and everyone is unhappy, even miserable. But what about when it really works? What kind of people does it take to make it work? Who wants to work that hard? Who wants to take that big of a risk? Of course, I think I know all the answers – afterall, my dad was so great that Brad Paisley co-wrote a song about him!

I remember the first time Wayne came to pick up my Mom for a date. I was nearly 12 and I figured I knew how to tell if a guy was cool. He was nice, didn’t talk down to me, and he didn’t suck up to me (you know, the ol’ impress-Mom-by-how-nice-I-am-to-the-kid routine). He was handsome, too! Best of all, he didn’t creep me out! He got my seal of approval from the start.

After they were married, there were adjustments to be made. From my vantage point, he took it all in stride. He knew my sister and I needed a father, someone we could love and respect who would keep us on the straight and narrow (well, he tried!). When we made him mad, we knew it! He did not take our crap, that’s for sure. Wayne knew who he was and what he stood for and he always worked to instill those values in us.

My favorite thing about Wayne was his humor, it was contagious. He made Mom laugh all the time (and she needed to laugh). He found humor in most things. Of course, I was an easy target of his humor; oh, how he loved to make me blush!

I didn’t always make things easy for my Mom and Dad. As I look back, I think realizing that makes me appreciate even more how incredibly blessed I am to have the privilege of calling Wayne my “Dad.” He loved my Mom enough to love me and my sister as his own – he didn’t have to, but I’m glad he did.

I love you, Dad, and wish I’d loved you better while you were still with us. I miss you.